First Day High?

that's what my new found friend named John, short for Averrette Jun, commented to me today when i was complaining about the blisters on my feet. It's so corny but... it's corny.

the training was awesome. the trainers were totally fluent. they're very intelligent. THEY because there were two of them in a class of more or less 20 trainees. we're going to spend 2 weeks with them. it's great because we get to be trained not only with soft skills but also about leadership and the likes. in my previous jobs we had 1 week of soft skills and we only touched a bit of US culture and stuff. So i guess that this is a great experience.

we also got to write and talk. well, we talked a lot but, we got this FREE SPEECH activity when we draw-lot a topic and say something about it for 3 minutes. the topic that i got was about an ERA that i would most fit in. i think i had the most absurd and senseless answer. my co-trainees were really smooth at speaking in front of the class. their answers were organized and substantial. i was challenged in a way.

i was the last person to speak in front.

i told the class i would base it through music. since i'm a big music fan. and the era i would most probably fit in would be the 70's hippie era and the 80's punk era. I told them i like Bob Marley and Jim Morrison---the only artists i could think of from the 70's era. and The Clash from the 80's punk era. also the "only" band that got stuck on my head. i told them if i had the chance to go back to that era, i'd like to watch a The Clash concert and rock n' roll.

that was pretty dumb. it's a First Day low, afterall.

fistfight

a few days ago, i believe you've already read it, i've written some silly notes about a person who posts stupid lies?!? his posts were all bullshit, and full of hate. i already deleted it of course but it got me REALLY upset. so i went and gave that person a blow in the head (or so i imagined). i went online and talked to him---as what Cielo suggested. we fought and fought until he ran out of reasons and excuses. haha. so it became funny.

the guy is CRAZY. but i love him. i believe that's what made me fall for him in the first place.

tell me i'm not weird.

rhyme without reason

deym.

this is a really great song. from a new band---HILERA. don't know much about them, but there's one thing i'm sure of. they fuckin' ROCK!



amazing. the video is great. it doesn't cost much but it totally represents the band. what they are. what they play. check the "THE CLASH" poster. hehe. i hope they don't "sell-out" in the future. i hope they'd stick around for a long time.

there have been too many familiar genres that came out in the local music scene.. at least in the mainstream market that is. there's the "everyrock"? like uhm.. (this is awkward) Pupil; there's a lot of POP of course.. like Cueshe and all other pogibands; there's hardcore; there's rap-core; there's emo like typecast etc. but PUNK? who ever thought of that? i thought PUNK is DEAD here in the Phillippines. that is why i'm so fond of this band. i really did thought PUNK is DEAD. or maybe i'm just not that updated? hehe. but no need to fret because HILERA is here to save the world from shitless rhymes! rock n roll!

tears

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those are my tears.

This is No Ordinary Love

i think i already told you. i was so fuckin' bored this morning at home. all i did was watch TV. then i saw this MYX LIVE thing on MYX. URBAN-fucking-DUB was playing. and they talked about Sade.. fuck , i think i'll never listen to this song the same way as i did before... i was taken by Urbandub's rendition. fucking GREAT. so i'd like to share it. the quality is not that good, but this is the same clip.

"This is No ORDINARY LOVE!!!!" (sang my heart out)




No Ordinary Love
Sade

I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could give
I gave you love
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my love
You took my love

Didn't I tell you
What I believe
Did somebody say that
A love like that won't last
Didn't I give you
All that I've got to give baby

I keep crying
I keep crying for you
There's nothing like you and I baby

This is no ordinary love
No ordinary love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary love

When you came my way
You brightened every day
With your sweet smile

oh, Goddammit

thank god i can edit my Tag-Board. i can't believe some people that had been you're everything can tell you things that people who try to bring you down would tell you. unbelievable. am i that horrible? if i try to look back on the things that i did and did not do... i don't think i am. had i ever been so unfaithful? uhm..sure i got lotsa crushes but none of them i've flirted with. just not my style. i think i am a very serious person. which i sometimes hate. not that i don't have a sense of humor. i do laugh a lot over silly things, but i'm serious in how i deal with things about my career, my best friends, my family, love life and all. which by the way is zilch. i don't know. am i a horrible person?

i'm sleeping in Laguna tonight by the way. my brother's place. just need to be his slave for a bit. i need to borrow some dough. i'm so fuckin' poor. "poor as a rat" as Angel puts it. haha! i get so BORED at home...so this change of environment i think is also great for me. tell you what, i was so BOREd that i started texting those people in the text-chat thingie on MTV. Hahahahaaha! well, their numbers turned out be really busy. geez, imagine your number being broadcast in national television. and it's fuckin' MTV. hahaha! my desperation didn't get anywhere. so i texted several friends instead who turned out to be really energetic and giddy at texting me back. hehehe! that's why i love them. i love a them lot. on Sunday i think i'd be sleeping in Pasay, my cousin's place. i think it's an obligation more than anything else. haha! i promised her i'd sleep in their place when i get a break from work. now i got the break, so i have no excuse not to go there on Sunday.

P.S. no more BULLSHIT on the tag-board please. i MEAN it. otherwise u'll fuckin' regret it goddamit.

life sucks

i'm all wide awake straight for 27 hours now. i'm tired. but i need to say something.

there are plenty of things i don't understand in this world. sometimes i try not to understand it. i dismiss my attitude in two words: "life sucks." but why? why don't we try harder to find the answers to our questions? maybe we do, but there aren't enough credible people around us that may be able to tell us if we're right or wrong. like why do i like a particular genre of music? maybe there's nothing wrong. maybe that's just how it is. but doesn't it sound a bit dense to just accept things as it is? i remember a favorite ely buendia line for people dissing his i-don't-care-about-you attitude... "take it at face value!" well, who ever said life is perfect? or any person is perfect? so we gotta just "take it at face value!" so life sucks. and i'm not making sense AT ALL.

i'm in good terms with Jane now. we spoke from the SM Mall of Asia to LKG Tower. we talk about no one else but Irene. she's been really crazy lately, that's why.

this may be my last post for the month. my heart is broken, and so is my pocket. i'm gonna smoke my life away until the 25th. it's my start date for DELL. i think this video below is going to be the song i'd be singing in my head until i'm over the stupid heartache.

it's sobbing time

i only have 1 week left in ACS. now i'm seriously contemplating the people and things i will miss. somehow i feel scared. what if i won't have friends in DELL? what if i won't like the working environment? what if i won't have friends? what if i'd regret this decision? though Irene's right. i shouldn't be thinking negative things. however anyone in my position i think would be. ACS is my "comfort zone." i love it there regardless of the meager pay. the people are warm and friendly. the management is very lax. the account is very easy and interesting. i have always wanted to work behind tv productions. and with this job, somehow that dream came true. it may seem very unlikely but it's really cool. now i'm going to go to another company. the pay is nice.. VERY nice. they're a bit strict which is very understandable. i may see several familiar faces there. the account is related to computers. it's no problem to me. but i will miss DIRECTV! *sob* *sob*

uhm?!?

a lot of things have happened, it's really hard to keep up with this. but as much as possible i'd like to make this blog very updated, otherwise, some events will get lost in my head and they may not be shared for the rest of eternity.

uhm.

i promise i'll post "something" tommorow.

5anwich

brushing elbows with Death

Last Saturday i think i just had a conversation with Death. I've never been totally scared in my life until last Saturday.

It all started with a little lump on my neck. It wasn't all that evident but if you touch it you can feel it. Scared that it might grow to a very embarrassing size, i decided to visit Healthway in Market Market, where we can get free consultations. one of the job benefits.

After an ardous task of finding where Market Market is (a mall), i finally went face-to-face with the doctor. i was expecting a single, handsome doctor to make the bother all worth it. It turned out, he was a bit cute. sad thing is---he has a wedding ring. okay, so he felt my neck and instantly felt the lump i was talking about. he said it could be caused by 3 things: (1)an infection due to a cough; (2) i may have TB; (3) cancer. he said it casually so i never felt alarmed at all. at the back of my head i'm thinking maybe it's TB. i met up with an officemate of mine a month ago who was diagnosed of TB. Hmmm. until he decided he'd take a look at what's behind my NOSE. he had thin metal stick with a small light bulb at the bottom (which i then later realized it has a micro-camera on it too!) and opposite that is a tube that goes to a machine without a name. he also had this thing that looks like a scalpel; i had a feeling he'd stuck it inside my nose and he DID. he used some cotton with it to numb the insides of my VIRGIN unshaved nose. It felt cool. then he stuck that stick with a light bulb inside. imagine the feeling of being devirginized. that's how it felt. he did not only did it once but thrice!

after that he showed me the "nasal-pharengeal endoscopy" video as he called it. finally, i've seen what's behind my NOSE!

and he noticed that my right nasal-pharengeal tonsil is much much bigger than my left nasal-pharengeal tonsil. he was alarmed by this. and so was i. then the most painful part came, when he felt it necessary to take some samples of that tonsil. i have to endure the pain of him pulling off some flesh behind my nose. it hurt. damn it did---like hell! i was shaking after the second try. my tears fell and all. i saw the flesh on a test tube right thereafter. he said he was going to test it. i have to come back by Tuesday to verify if i was TB. it turned out i didn't have TB.

After that horrible stuff crossed my head. what if i don't have much time to live? what if i have cancer? what if? what if? what am i going to do? where am i going to go? how am i going to deal with it? the questions were neverending. it was just a tiny brush of the reality of DEATH. he's there. lurking. we'll never know when he'll come to take us.

chubby china

Team Ram's Yuhoo Gang, Rey and Rommel!

YUMMY CHINA!